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Married February 2, 1974
Don't repeat the mistake on page 847 of The Prayer Book . Here is what God really requires from the chosen people:
A series of essays in the Episcopal Church
To a Young Gay Man from an Old One
By Larry Graham
The word “comfort” really means to provide strength. So, I have some words of comfort for you.
“God is love,” the Holy Scriptures tell us. It is in God’s nature to love, so he made all creation out of love. That means that you were made by love, out of love, to be loved.
And when God made the world, he proclaimed it “good.” Good isn’t the same thing as perfect, of course, but that doesn’t mean God made mistakes. It just means that the world and everything in it are in the process of being perfected.
That includes you. You are not a mistake; just imperfect, and on the way to perfection.
Sometimes whole societies and nations get things wrong. The entire Western world has been wrong about homosexuality for centuries. It is just starting to figure this out now. And some people are catching on faster than others.
Heretofore homosexuality has been thought of as a choice. But you and I know, deep in our souls, that it is an innate part of our very being. It is the way we were created to be; made by love for love.
Your sexuality, and mine, are God’s gift to us. To deny that is the same thing as saying that God doesn’t know what He’s doing. But no matter what others may think, you are God’s good handiwork, just as he made you. You are not a mistake and you are not mistaken, either.
What we make of the gift of homosexuality, in a society that still doesn’t always “get it,” can make life difficult at times. But each of us is supposed to grow fully into the person that we were created to be. For you, and for me, that means being (among many other things) a gay man.
I am old now, and came out half a century ago. My father was appalled. Never the less, I persisted in being who I was created to be. And, at the same time, living my life honestly, openly, honorably and with dignity. Not too many years later my father said to me, “Son, I love you. I want you to know that no matter how you live your life, I am proud of the man you have become.”
So, take courage. Live honestly with dignity and honor. How you live your life speaks more loudly about your character than anything anyone can say against you. Use all your gifts and talents for your own betterment and the betterment of the society around you.
In so living, you will find comfort.
May God, who created you out of love for love’s sake, abide with you always.
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